You might think I'm joking, but that's just part of the act.

My head doesn’t hurt as much today. Why? My head cold has moved down, from my temple to my chest. So now I just have a ratchety cough. All things pass, eventually, into the night. Unfortunately I don’t feel sick enough to stay home from work, which means I can attend our mandatory end-of-year affair that only lasts from 3-5 but feels a lot longer. It’s like a really boring wedding or being made to go to someone’s strange religious ceremony that isn’t really about anything. It doesn’t particularly honor anyone, no one gets very wild or interesting. It’s just forced together time. It’s also formal, which doesn’t make much sense since it’s only for two hours on a Monday afternoon. It’s not a nice event, it’s too fancy for what it is. It’s too much effort and there’s no pay off. It fails to do what they expect: create a sense of camaraderie. It’s sad because they could accomplish something greater if they only did something less, something local. When the effort exceeds the event, then it’s already failed. But what do I know? I feel claustrophobic and lonely, as if I’m being inverted and expelled all at the same time. This is the calamity of boredom. I have an awful headache for no good reason this morning. I’m full of complaints, though none of them are of great enough importance to worry about. I want to move forward on some things, but I think I have to wait a while for them. Only a few months. Then I will apply my analytic side to them. They will be my set piece for 2006. It already feels more accomplished to think about it. I watched “Scream” for no reason yesterday and decided the best line in the film is when the Party of Five girl say’s she’s a sexual anorexic. That was the high point for me. Why does David Arquette smile so much? Courtney Cox also didn’t look all that skeletal in it, but maybe it was all that hair (and those highlights). I wanted to go out this weekend, but much like the guy with the early onset Alzheimer’s in Law & Order: Criminal Intent, my cold kept me down the longer the days wore on. This meant I got to go out during the day, but then felt too exhausted at night. Today I feel better, but now there’s nowhere to go. At least I have the next couple of days off. It’s tiring trying to feel slightly sorry for myself. How can I when I have this lovely Jonathan Adler designed note paper box sitting right next to me? Anyone with something this nice is doing ok for himself, a voice is telling me. I’m going to listen to that voice because it sounds so much nicer than yours.